Deeper Well
By David Morris

Independence Is Overrated!

This week, I asked author Julie Ziglar Norman to contribute a thought to the Deeper Well blog. There’s strong spiritual message of community and caring in the topic she addresses.

I’m learning that it is wonderful to need help. Years ago, a counselor told me that I was too independent.  He said I needed to learn to be interdependent and that until I did, I would be missing out on one of the most wonderful aspects of having relationships.

Over time I got a little better at needing others, but overall I still tend to be an “I can do that myself” kind of person. Asking for help is hard. I have never wanted to be an inconvenience or burden to anyone, and though I hate to admit it, pride has played a part in my attitude toward needing help. After all, Daddy always said I was “the little one who was everywhere doing everything.” I have a reputation to uphold.

Rotator cuff surgery reduced me to a heap of shameless neediness. It also opened the door for me to bask in the priceless care and attention of my middle daughter, Jenni. Oh, how I wish I had heeded my counselor’s words earlier. I have felt so loved and special and treasured—and did I say loved? 

Jenni drove the 50 miles to our home every third day for more than four months. She vacuumed, cleaned, emptied the dishwasher, kept me company, picked up stuff I need from the store—and that’s not all. Jenni cleaned my horse stalls!  And she cleans them even better than I do, and that is saying a lot.

Independence really isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Getting to be with my daughter regularly after years of her being married and raising her own family was a blessing I hadn’t anticipated. I’m thinking I might get my knee fixed a lot sooner than I originally planned.

Julie Ziglar Norman, the daughter of motivational speaker Zig Ziglar, shares her soul-searching journey from heartache to redemption that will help you discover the power of God's grace and forgiveness in Growing Up Ziglar.

David Morris, PhD, is the editorial director for Guideposts Books. He keeps busy mending his old house, playing guitar, and volunteering. He, his wife and two daughters live in northern New Jersey. Follow David on Twitter @davidrmorris or get the RSS feed to his Deeper Well blog.