When a loved one is away, let their absence make your heart grow fonder.
Posted in , Jun 7, 2019
Recently, my husband was away for longer than the few days he periodically travels for business. I felt confident in my ability to manage our household on my own, and I knew he would soon return and we would ease back into our daily routines. But there was no way around it, I missed the man!
I took this as a good sign of our loving relationship, but also as a reminder that even so-called “negative” emotions can be part of walking a positive path. This got me thinking about what it means to miss someone in a healthy way.
1) Focus on What You Appreciate About the Person
“Growth in love comes from a place of absence,” says the writer Coco J. Ginger. When someone you care about is not available for the daily check-ins, chats and just moments of quiet presence, your sad feelings reflect just how deeply you appreciate them when you are together.
2) Try Something Unexpected
When my husband was away, I started an art project with my son, experimented with some easy weeknight dinner ideas and did other things inspired by the break in my routine. Playing with new ways of moving through my day had the added benefit of keeping my focus on positive opportunities (rather than just on what was missing) in his absence.
3) Feel Your Feelings
If you have experienced grief and loss in your life, you know that missing someone during a temporary absence is a privilege. But it is still permissible—and important—to acknowledge that when someone is away, you can expect moments in your day when you wish they weren’t. When feelings of sadness or loneliness come up, let yourself experience them, and then visualize them floating away like a cloud across a breezy sky.
What are some healthy ways you cope with missing someone who’s away?