Teens and Sarcasm

Sarcasm is a great way to drive away friends. Here's how to avoid it.

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Posted in , Feb 13, 2015

Sarcasm is not great for friendship.  Photo from 123RF(r).

We all use sarcasm from time to time. Sometimes it’s funny and provides a good laugh for everyone, but other times, it’s like a verbal dagger intended to hurt others.

Does your teen daughter have a sarcastic friend, someone who has hurt her with snarky, sarcastic words? Has she been sarcastic toward others?

Sarcasm, how to move away from it. Here are a few things sarcastic friends say or do:

1)   Tell hurtful jokes.

2)   Say “just kidding” all the time.

3)   Hide their feelings with negative comments.

4)   Give fake compliments like, “Nice shirt. Where did you get it–a garage sale?”

5)   Hide their anger by saying, “No, I’m not angry. I’m really, really happy. Can’t you tell?”

6)   Use sarcasm to lighten the tone when a friend shares something serious.

Here is how anyone can shift from sarcasm to a more productive approach:

1)   Get real with your feelings! Are you jealous? There will be times when things don’t go your way, and you don’t get what you want. That’s no excuse to take it out on your friends.

2)   Set a goal to break your sarcastic habit. Tell your friends to remind you when your joking goes overboard. Give them permission to tell you over and over again. Believe me, their reminders will get old–quick. You’ll stop eventually.

3)   Are you hiding an emotion? The next time you are sarcastic, think about what feelings you might be trying to hide. You don’t have to tell anyone what you discover. It’s a good exercise, so you start getting in touch with your emotions.

If you’re brave, share what you really mean afterwards. Unless, of course, it’s going to hurt someone.

4)   Work on staying positive with your friends. Bringing them down with sarcasm leads to loneliness because your friends will get tired of your negative comments and seek new friends who uplift them.

Changing your behavior can be difficult, but not impossible. You can do it! For nothing will be impossible with God. (Luke 1:37, ESV)

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