How to Give and Get Respect

The secret to gaining esteem from others is found in Jesus' Word.

- Posted on Feb 17, 2012

Men shaking hands

One of the deepest desires of human nature is to be well thought of, respected, loved. How do you gain the esteem of others? Jesus tells us the secret in John 13:34: “As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”

Here’s how to gain the respect you crave:

Give esteem, respect and love to other people.
In this life we only get back what we give. Give hate to the world and you will receive hate. Cultivate an attitude of superiority and you will be treated with an attitude of superiority. Practice feelings of prejudice and ill will and contempt and that is what you will get back. The whole universe is an echo cavern. What you send out reverberates back to you. That is what Christianity teaches. “A new commandment I give you: Love one another” (John 13:34). That is the smartest, shrewdest, most subtle formula for abundant living that ever was created.

Never let people upset you.
If somebody is rude to you, bothers you, does something unjust to you, you have to be the kind of person who won't let himself become upset. If you can do this, gradually you will win over the people who have been attacking you, annoying you. You will gain their respect. It is not an easy thing to do, but it is a great thing and, with God’s help, you can do it. “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18).

Put other people’s needs on a par with your own.
This is what Christ meant by loving your neighbor as yourself. Philippians 2:3-4 admonishes us to “in humility consider others” and to look “to the interests of others.”If you do this, amazing pathways of service will open up to you. You may run into opposition. You may be laughed at. But the rewards of meeting a need, of righting a wrong, of improving your world far outweigh the possible risks or hazards.

If we will do our part, God stands ready to do his. But he doesn't go where he's not invited. So the last and most important bit of advice I have to offer is three simple words: Ask him in. If you do, you will be blessed. And if you share this blessing with others, you will be loved…and respected.


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