Lord, Could I Catch a Break?!
I was up early this morning, thinking about everything that needs to be fixed before we can sell our apartment. As I was pouring my second cup of coffee, I was hit with an “I don’t wanna!” moan of weariness. Sometimes I get plain tired of plugging ahead.
Lord, I sighed, Can’t I have a break here?
It occurred to me that I’d just had a break.
I’m so tired of this! Really, it shouldn’t have to be this hard.
It occurred to me that my definition of hard is a bit warped. I am not, after all, an Israelite dragged away from my homeland, working as a slave in Babylon with no hope of seeing my family again.
Then it occurred to me that whenever I want to give up, it’s never the Spirit whispering, “This is way too hard! Better stop.”
I put my coffee cup down and looked at that spot in the ceiling where I often focus when I talk to God. Okay, Lord, I sighed, I know You’ll give me the strength. Perhaps the problem is only that what I need is the will to do the work you've given me to do.
God's will may test us in ways that are difficult to contemplate.
When your inner voice is screaming, something better is waiting beyond the noise.