Letting Go of Blame

3 tips to help parents move on from mistakes and keep working toward the victories.

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Posted in , May 11, 2015

Stop the blame game. Photo 123RF(r)

Do you blame yourself for the bad choices your teen daughter has chosen lately? Is she making worldly choices or choosing paths that have you wondering what has happened to her? Does she blame you for her misfortunes?

We’ve all been there–our great grandparents, our grandparents, our parents and now us, the parents of a new generation of teens. It’s the generational blame game. We blame the previous generation for the questionable choices we make in our lives. Three words can change the outcome of this generational game–It is finished.

The phrase, “It is finished,” is the sixth statement Jesus spoke before He died as He hung on the cross. Jesus finished His work on earth. Every sin was judged and our redemption was paid in full. The blame game is finished.

READ MORE: HOW TO SAVE A TEEN’S LIFE

Here are some suggestions to help you let go of lingering parental guilt:

1)  Celebrate your victories as a parent.
Often we focus on the mistakes that we have made and forget about the positive encouraging things that we do right. Jesus said, “It is finished.” Move on from the mistakes and keep working toward the victories.

2)  Acknowledge your mistakes and mess-ups.
Be quick to apologize. Watching you take responsibility for your mistakes will help your teen daughter learn to take responsibility for her own actions and mistakes.

3)  Let go of your blame and guilt.
Submit your feelings and regrets to the Lord and let Him take control. When He died for you, He took all of your sins and mistakes with Him and proclaimed, “It is finished.” Believe His words.

Life is too short to look back and wonder what you could’ve done better. Instead, look forward and set your eyes on today and the blessings in life that Jesus has given you. 

No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead. (Philippians 3:13, NLT)

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