Why, Lord? Why?

When a parent faces a tragic loss, know this: The Lord is in control. Lean on His strength.

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Posted in , May 18, 2015

Coping with loss. When a parent faces the death of a child.

Before Terry Squires founded Todaysgirls.com, she was an ER nurse. Here is an experience from that time.

One of the emergency room nurses took the call from the ambulance. It would be arriving in 10 minutes with a 17-year-old patient who intentionally lit himself on fire. The prognosis was not good. The patient was unrecognizable and 80% of his body had been burned.

The ER code room burst into action to prepare the trauma room. The respiratory, lab and the surgery departments were notified and ready for the nerve-racking situation.

The teenage patient reached the hospital with lifesaving measures already initiated by the EMS men and was transported to the trauma room. My initial private thought when I saw the condition of the patient’s body was, “Why, Lord? Why?”

READ MORE: LETTING GO OF BLAME

Our emergency room code team did everything humanly possible to save the life of this young teen. Unfortunately, a few days later, he died. I wasn’t surprised because of the severity of his burn trauma, but I was broken-hearted by the rumor that traveled throughout the emergency department: He had done this to himself because of a break-up with his girlfriend.

Once again, I asked God, “Why?”

Tragedy happens in life, and we often ask the Lord this question. How could this happen? What could we have done differently to prevent such a tragedy?

My friend, these are questions only our Lord will reveal in His own timing. It may be difficult to understand. It may be painful for many years but know that the Lord is still in control and His plan and purpose are perfect. We simply have to trust Him.

Have you lost a teen in your life? Are you angry with God for your circumstance? Do you ask Him why? Here are a few suggestions that may help:

1)  It’s normal to be angry and question God when you are faced with a traumatic loss. Lean on His strength and He will carry you through your emotions. Even though you’re angry and might be challenging Him, go to Him, He will hear your prayers. He will hear your anger.

When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer. (Psalm 94:19, NLT)

2)  Give yourself a lifetime of space and grace. Many people put time limits on when someone should “be over” a death of a loved one. There is never getting over the loss of a child, but God gives us the strength to move forward in life when we’re ready.

3)  Surround yourself with those who support and love you. They are the ones who will be there for you in future.

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. (Psalm 34:18, NLT)

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